Shop talk

Can we talk about shopping and dropping? Through rigorous cross-cultural experience, I can give expert advice on both.

You need this advice. Usually, shopping tips come from shoppers. Hear now the counsel of a dropper.

1. Do not set out on a marathon shopping expedition the first day after traveling three days to reach an exotic place halfway around the world. In particular, do not start shopping at noon, without eating lunch, and continue shopping until well after dinner time, without eating dinner.

WARNING. If you decide to do the above – when your exhausted body and overloaded senses are shouting, “Stop!” – your mind will refuse to come and your emotions will act like preschoolers helping mom in the grocery store. Thus, you will prove easy prey for the nice salespersons trained to ambush American tourists.

2a. Divide your cross-cultural shopping group into two teams. On Team A (for Avid), place all those who enjoy spending roughly two days in each store. On Team D (for Dash and/or Drop), place all those who case the place with a quick walk-through and then purchase or move on. Keep in mind: Dashers drop far more quickly than avid shoppers.

2b. If you cannot divide into two teams, give people the option of not going. I know: You true shoppers cannot believe anyone would choose not to shop. But offer the option anyway. If someone takes you up on it, try not to stare as if they need mental help.

WARNING. If you combine Teams A and D, the dashers will spend most of the day w-a-i-t-i-n-g. This hinders camaraderie. When waiting includes long stretches sweating profusely in alleys crammed with other profusely sweating shoppers and trying in vain to find someplace to sit or even stand without being jostled and stared at, you may have a mutiny on your hands.

3. Wear comfy shoes – but not dilapidated ones.

WARNING. You may find your soul – er, sole – exposed.

The evening of our marathon shopping day in south Asia, we disembarked from the van in an underground garage and took an elevator up one floor, stepping out into a mini-version of a department store.

Three steps into the store, the sole of my left sandal split almost in two. With every step, the sole yawned open, like a hot dog bun attached at the small end.

I had made only two purchases the entire day. Clopping laboriously across the store, I considered one item and decided to get it. Clopping back across the store, I’d just chosen a second item when our local guide yelled, “Come on! We’re leaving! Now!”

All day, I had waited while others shopped at their leisure. “I just need to pay for these two things,” I said. The guide shouted, “Leave them! We’ll come back later!”

Leaving the items, I clopped slowly to the elevator. We rode up one floor, stepped out into another mini-department store – and everyone fanned out to do more shopping. I couldn’t believe it!

4. Remember: Even shopping trips from hell do end.

Riding the elevator back down one floor, I made my purchases, then waited some more. Ultimately, the shopping ended. Thankfully, my suitcase held more sandals. Yet even when my body settled down, my soul stayed agitated.

In such times, don’t coddle your soul. Talk to it straight. I waited too long. Finally, borrowing words from Psalm 116:7-8, The Message: “I said to myself, ‘Relax and rest. GOD has showered you with blessings. Soul, you've been rescued from death; Eye, you've been rescued from tears; And you, Foot, were kept from stumbling.’”

© 2007, Deborah P. Brunt. All rights reserved.